Success Common Sense

I send a career success quote to my subscribers every day.  If you would like to begin receiving these quotes, go to http://www.BudBilanich.com and enter your name and email address just below the image of Succcess Tweets.  It’s that easy.  Yesterday, the quote was from Lao Tzu, the Chinese philosopher…

“Kindness in words creates confidence.  Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.”

This quote reminded me of an article I read in last Sunday’s New York Times Jobs section called “Building a Bridge to a Lonely Colleague.”  In part it said, “Loneliness reduces an employee’s productivity…because it results in increased hostility, negativity, depressed mood, increased anxiety, lack of perceived control and decreased cooperativeness.”  Wow!  That’s the bad news.

According to the artilce, the good news is “helping a colleague our of loneliness may involve such simple steps as taking time for a chat, asking for input on a project, or offering an invitation to coffee or lunch.”  In other words, being kind can help both you and a lonely colleague.  These are great ideas.  They can help you create meaningful relationships with people at work who you might overlook at first.

Tweet 127 in my career advice book Success Tweets says, “Pay it forward.  Build relationships by giving with no expectation of return.  Give of yourself to build strong relationships.”  Engaging colleagues who are isolated or may seem lonely is one way to pay it forward.

This tweet reminds me of an inspirational movie I sent to my subscribers a while back.  It’s called the 100-0 principle.  The principle is simple.  The best way to build solid relationships is to take 100% responsibility for them.

In 2009 I participated in a writing project with my colleagues at the Creating WE Institute.  We published a little book called, 42 Rules for Creating WE. The rules were short essays that contained a lot of great career advice.  I contributed three rules.  One was called, “There is No Quid Pro Quo in WE.”  This rule goes directly to the idea of paying it forward described in Tweet 127.  I’d like to share the career advice in this essay – with a few minor edits – with you here.

WE is built on relationships; the idea that we are all connected, and that through a WE-centric, rather than a traditional I-centric approach, our collective wisdom grows and evolves.  This kind of thinking creates stronger organizations and societies.  It fosters mutual shared respect for the unique contribution every person is capable of making.  Solid, lasting, mutually beneficial relationships are at the core of WE.  Giving with no expectation of return is a great way to create these types of relationships.

This is a quid pro quo world: you do for me and I’ll do for you.  While there is nothing wrong in reciprocating a good deed or a favor, there is a fundamental problem with quid pro quo.  It is reactive not proactive.  Too many people wait for others to go first.  They adopt the attitude, “When and if you do for me, I’ll do for you.”  This scarcity mentality is not conducive to creating WE, or building strong relationships.  When you come from a scarcity mentality, you focus on holding on to what you already have.  This can prevent you from receiving what you might possibly get.

On the other hand, giving with no expectation of return comes from a proactive abundance mentality.  When you give with no expectation of return, you are acknowledging the abundance of the universe.  You are demonstrating faith that the good you do will benefit others close to you and the world at large – and that good things will come back to you.

Giving with no expectation of return is ironic.  I have found that the more I give, the more I receive; often from unlikely sources.  But that’s not my reason for giving – and I hope it is not yours.  The best reason for giving is the basic joy of making a difference in other people’s lives and in creating a WE-centric world.

I love the Liberty Mutual Insurance “responsibility” ads.  They are a very visual demonstration of the ideas behind creating WE – especially giving with no expectation of return.  You’ve probably seen them.

They begin with someone going a little out of his or her way to do something that benefits others; picking up a piece of trash, opening a door for another person who’s hands are full.  Another person observes this and goes out of his or her way for someone else.  The cycle repeats several times during the ad.  The message is clear.  We are all better off when we help each other.

In the end, giving with no expectation of return comes down to your mentality – scarcity or abundance.  If you come from a scarcity mentality, you will live by quid pro quo, and perpetuate the I-centric status quo.  If you come from an abundance mentality, you will give with no expectation of return and begin to create a WE-centric world and create the kind of strong, mutually beneficial relationships that will help you create the life and career success you want and deserve.

I choose abundance and paying it forward.  I agree with Winston Churchill, who once said, “We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.”  When you give with no expectation of return you will get a good life.  You’ll also get a better world; one in which we all look out for one another.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  Successful people are adept at building strong relationships.  They understand and use the career advice in Tweet 127 in Success Tweets.  “Pay it forward.  Build relationships by giving with no expectation of return.  Give of yourself to build strong relationships.”  Reaching out to lonely or isolated colleagues is one way of paying it forward — and is the opposite of quid pro quo.  When you go first – reach out to someone or give of yourself to help someone else, with no expectations of return – you are laying the foundation for a successful relationship.  When you wait for people to reach out to you, or to reciprocate a good deed by another person, you are engaging in quid pro quo behavior that usually results in lost relationship opportunities.  Do yourself a favor, follow this career advice when it comes to relationship building – pay it forward.  You’ll be helping yourself – and others around you.

That’s my career advice on building a bridge to a lonely colleague.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily musings on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.

Requests to do a guest post for this career success blog are very gratifying to me.  They mean that somebody is paying attention to what I have to say and thinks that others are too.  The other day I received an offer from the folks at www.college.com to do a guest post. I suggested that they write about how to make a good first impression when starting a new job.  Here’s what they have to say…

How to Make a Good First Impression in a New Job

When you are starting a new job, you have a new chance to make a first impression. The way in which you begin your job will have a major impact not only in how management views you, but also in how well you are able to get along with your co-workers and make an impression in your department.

You want to portray yourself as a consummate professional, someone capable of doing the job who is skilled enough to excel. You also want to portray yourself as a team player, someone who will get along with and work well with co-workers and as someone who is just an all-around good worker to have on staff. Doing all of this can be a challenge, but there are a few key tips to keep in mind that can help you to make a killer first impression.

Prepare, Prepare, Prepare

One of the best things you can do to make a good first impression is to be prepared. When you went for the interview, you should have paid attention to what people were wearing. Dress in a similar style or maybe just a touch better. You don`t want to come to a casual office in a formal business suit, but you also don`t want to show up in jeans either. You should fit in with your co-workers and peers, but regardless of what they wear, you should also make sure that you look clean, tidy, put together and on top of things.

You may also wish to try to learn as much as you can about the job you will be doing, the company you will be working for and the people you will be working with. Almost all companies today have websites and, in many cases, there are employee reviews or even blogs about working at the company. Perusing these sources can help make sure you are informed and can go in ready to hit the ground running.

Pay Attention to Corporate Culture

When you start work, it is up to you to fit into the corporate culture and find your place within the organizational structure. While it is okay to try to set yourself apart, which is, in fact, a good thing to do, it is not a good idea to be at odds with the way the corporation works or to make an enemy of your coworkers.

At least at the beginning, you should try to find things in common with your coworkers to form relationships with both your peers and with those working above you. This means paying attention to the way they work and interact so you can model your behavior on their actions.

Come on Time

When you come to your first day of work, it is essential to be on time. You also want to avoid long lunches or leaving early. You want to show that you are grateful for getting the job, dedicated and responsible.

Do Your Work Well, But Start Slow

You always want to do amazing work that wows your bosses, but you also need to start slow and take the time to learn what is expected of you and what your role will be. Observe, watch how others work and how your boss behaves towards you and take the time to learn how your boss wants things done.

No one likes a new person who comes in suggesting a bunch of changes or who seems to think their way of doing something is better than the established routine. If your way is better, there will be plenty of time to convince your boss and coworkers after they get to know you.

Whether you are fresh out of college or have been working for years, these tips will help you succeed, become a great employee that every boss will love and move you towward the life and career success you want and deserve.

That’s some great career advice on making a good first impression when you start a new job from my friends at college.com.  I think they are right on.  Much of this advice is echoed in my career success books like Success Tweets.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading these daily thoughts on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: To enhance my work as a career success coach, I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb/

Tweet 115 in my career success book Success Tweets says, “Become an excellent presenter.  Careers have been made on the strength of one or two great presentations.”  This is true.  And here’s some more great career advice.  Stories are the best way to make your presentations come alive.  Stories are a powerful way to communicate. We all learn through stories. If you learn how to use stories effectively, you will become a great presenter – and get on the fast track to the career success you want and deserve.

I’ve come up with a simple three-step formula that anyone can use to create powerful stories that will help you make your point.

1. Identify your truth – something that in your heart of hearts you know to be “true.”
2. Think of the critical experiences you’ve had that have led you to this “truth.”
3. Shape those experiences into a story that you can tell at the drop of a hat.

Here’s an example of how I have used this formula. It’s a real story I often tell – especially when I am doing a talk on the importance of putting yourself in another person’s shoes.

“One of the things that I know to be true is that if I am going to be a good communicator, I must meet other people where they are, not where I would like them to be. Let me tell you how I know this.

“Several years ago, I had an assignment to conduct a team-building session for a manufacturing plant manager and his staff. The client was a friend of mine. I knew him well.

“I arrived at his office about 5:00 the afternoon of the day before our session. He said, “Do you have an agenda for tomorrow’s meeting?”

“I said, “Well, first we’ll do A, then B, followed by C. We’ll finish up with D.”

“He said, “Do you have an agenda?”

“At first, I thought he hadn’t been listening to what I just said, so I repeated myself: “First we’ll do A, then B, followed by C. We’ll finish up with D.”

“He said, “Yes, I know. That’s what you just said. Do you have an agenda?”

“At that point, it dawned on me that he was looking for a printed agenda. I said ‘No, but we really don’t need one. I’ve done a lot of meetings like this. It will go fine.’

“He said, ‘I’m not comfortable winging it.’  So we created an agenda using PowerPoint.

“The next day, the meeting went off without a hitch. We followed the agenda that I had in my head and he had on the PowerPoint slide. Everyone agreed that it was one of the best meetings of this type that they had ever attended.

“As we were debriefing I asked my client what he thought of the meeting.

“He said, ‘It was a great meeting, but I think we were lucky because we were winging it.’

“That frustrated me. I wasn’t winging it.  I had carefully mapped out the meeting in my head.  I knew what I wanted to accomplish and how I wanted to accomplish it.  I didn’t say anything to the client at that point because I didn’t want to damage my relationship with him.

“On the flight home, I thought about what happened. He thought we were winging it, and I thought we were following a well thought-out plan. The difference – he needs more structure than me. The piece of paper with the agenda was very important to him and his sense of order. To me, the paper wasn’t necessary, because I knew in my head what to do and how to do it.

“It became clear to me that if I want to influence not just this client, but anyone, I need to adapt my communication style to theirs.  From that day on, I modify my communication style to meet the needs of the other person.  I realized that I want to be influential, I need to adapt my communication style to others, not expect them to adapt their style to mine.

“This was a valuable lesson for me.  By adapting my style, I become more influential and powerful.  It may seem as if I’m yielding, when in fact, I’m taking charge of the situation,”

The story above illustrates how you can use my 1 – 2 – 3 formula to construct a story that you can use to make a point.  First, identify your truth – something that in your heart of hearts you know to be “true.”  Second, think of the critical experiences you’ve had that have led you to this “truth.”  Third, shape those experiences into a story that you can tell at the drop of a hat.

In this case, here’s what I know to be true – effective communicators adapt their communication style to their audience.  I know this to be true because of the incident I described above (as well as several other experiences I’ve had in my career).  I can tell this story any time I want to make a point about the importance of adapting your communication style to your audience.

The next time you are asked to do a talk, use this formula to illustrate the main point you want to make.  You’ll do a great talk and but yourself on the fast track to the career success you deserve.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  Successful people are great presenters.  As Tweet 115 in Success Tweets says, “Become an excellent presenter.  Careers have been made on the strength of one or two great presentations.”  Stories make presentations come alive.  They are not difficult to create.  Follow my 1 – 2 – 3 formula for creating and telling great stories.  First, identify your truth – something that in your heart of hearts you know to be “true.”  Second, think of the critical experiences you’ve had that have led you to this “truth.”  Third, shape those experiences into a story that you can tell at the drop of a hat.

That’s my career advice on how to create the stories that will brand you as a great presenter.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily musings on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.

You have to be in reasonable shape if you want to become the life and career success you deserve to be.  A reasonable level of fitness will help you deal with the inevitable stress that accompanies creating a successful life and career.  Diet and exercise are the key to living a healthy lifestyle.  You don’t have to be a fitness fanatic, but you do need to get some exercise and pay attention to what you eat.

I’m not the best role model when it comes to a healthy lifestyle.  I’ve battled weight my entire life.  However, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more serious about living a healthy lifestyle.  I exercise more and pay attention to what I eat.

I have found that the US government revised food pyramid provides great guidance on how to eat healthy.  Here are some of the highlights.  I try to follow these guidelines.  If you follow them, you will be doing well from a nutrition standpoint.

Eat at least three ounces of whole grain bread, cereals, crackers, rice or pasta every day.  Look for the word “whole” before the grain name on the list of ingredients.

Eat lots of vegetables every day.  I’m lucky here.  I love vegetables – even brussels sprouts.  Dark green and orange vegetables are the best for you.  Dry beans and peas are also good for you.

Fruits are also good for you.  Raw fruit is the best.  On the other hand, it’s best to limit your intake of fruit juice.  It’s often very high in calories and sugar.

Milk is a great source of calcium – something we all need for strong bones.  However, whole milk is very high in fat, so it’s best to drink low-fat or fat free milk.  Yogurt and cheese are also good sources of calcium.

Eat protein (meat, fish and poultry) is small quantities.  Bake, broil or grill – don’t fry – your protein.

The Mayo clinic suggests eating at least three fruits, four vegetables, four to eight servings of grains and pasta, three to seven servings of protein or dairy, three to five servings of fat and no more than 75 calories of sugar a day.

In general, you can eat healthy by eating more fruits, vegetables and whole grains.  Reduce your intake of saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol.  Limit sweets and salt.  Drink alcoholic beverages in moderation, if at all.  Control portion sizes and the total number of calories you consume.

Exercise is the other important component of a healthy lifestyle.  It’s best if you can exercise for at least 30 minutes five times a week.  Fitness experts suggest that of the 30 minutes 20 should be spent in some form of cardio exercise, five in stretching and five in resistance training.

I find that it’s best to choose a time to exercise and build your daily schedule around it.  Some people like first thing in the morning.  Others like the evening.  I prefer mid-day.  I find that if I exercise around noon, I am less hungry and consume fewer calories at lunch.

Hydration and circulation are important too.  Drink plenty of water.  It keeps you hydrated and helps combat hunger.  If you spent a lot of time at your desk, take a few minutes every hour to get up and stretch.  You can do leg lifts and stomach squeezes at your desk.  A little bit of activity can give you a burst of oxygen that will energize you and keep you feeling good.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  While good performance is not enough to guarantee your life and career success, it is a necessary component of your success plan.  A healthy lifestyle will make it easier for you to become a top performer.  You don’t have to become a fitness fanatic to be a high performer.  However, eating well and exercising will keep you sharp and on top of your game.  It will keep your stress in check.  And while a little stress is a good thing, too much stress can knock you out of the game.

That’s my career advice on the importance of living a healthy lifestyle.  What do you think?  What are your tricks for staying in shape?  Please share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily thoughts on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb/

I always enjoy books that make you think.  Advice My Parents Gave Me and Other Lessons I Learned from My Mistakes by Rodolfo Costa is one of those kinds of books.  It is filled with valuable life and career success wisdom distilled into bite sized chunks.  The wisdom inside can accelerate your progres toward your life and career success.

Rodolfo describes the book as “409 thoughts, quotes, lessons, ideas, suggestions, reminders, words of advice and encouragement to lead a successful, rewarding, peaceful, happy and fulfilling life.”  And he is right on.  The 409 snippets in this book will make you think.

I send a motivational quote to my subscribers every day.  If you’re not receiving these quotes you can go to http://www.BudBilanich.com and sign up in the space immediately below the image of my career advice book, Success Tweets.  I preface each quote with the words: “THINK, ACT, SUCCEED.”

As much as I believe that it’s important to read inspirational advice, I think it’s more important to think about what you read and to ask yourself, “How does this apply to me?”  Then it’s important to take action – to do something with what you read.

Let me sum up.  There are three easy things that you can do every day to help speed you along in your career success journey…

1. Read – anything that can help you create your career success.
2. Think – about how you can apply the lessons of what you’ve read in your life.
3. Act – do something.  Change a behavior, create a new habit.

If you do these three things consistently, you can’t help but succeed.  Advice My Parents Gave Me and Other Lessons I Learned from My Mistakes is a great source of life and career success advice.  If you read, think about and act on only one of the bits of wisdom per day, you’ll have over a year’s worth of lessons to apply in your life.

Rodolfo divides the book into 16 sections…

1. Positive Attitude and Optimism
2. Responsibility and Inspiration
3. Goals and Motivation
4. Action Persistence and Success
5. Self-Doubt, Fear and Criticism
6. Positive Thinking and Communication
7. Positive Self Esteem and Good Manners
8. Learning and Understanding
9. Money
10. Planning: Pat, Present and Future
11. Laughing and Taking it Easy
12. Love and Relationships
13. Children
14. Forgiveness and Acceptance
15. Happiness and Awareness
16. Gratitude and Getting Older

Here are 10 of my favorite pieces of advice in Advice My Parents Gave me and Other Lessons I Learned from My Mistakes….

• Life is wonderful.  Life is horrible.  Life is fabulous.  Life is terrible.  Life is great.  Life is awful.  Life is challenging. Life is a piece of cake.  Life is unfair.  Life is beautiful.  Life is ugly.  Life is tough.  Life is easy.  In reality, life is whatever you make it.
• Remember the word “failure” is just a state of mind.  Approach it with a positive attitude and you will notice that failure can become a learning experience toward your success.
• Always keep your promises and honor your commitments.  Give your word and carry it through – even if it is difficult, expensive or inconvenient.
• Visualize yourself as the person you want to be, act like the person you want to be, and strive to become the person you want to become.
• Establish goals for yourself, no matter how big, crazy or unattainable they may see.  Who are you not to achieve them and be successful?  Who are you not to be the person you want to be?  Believe in yourself.
• It may take a little time to get where you want to be, but if you pause and think for a moment, you will notice that you are no longer where you were.  Don’t stop – keep going.
• Don’t be embarrassed to say “I don’t know.”  It’s amazing how much you can learn just by admitting that.
• Keep your mind open.  Let your thoughts wander and allow your brain and subconscious mind point you in the direction of the answer you are seeking.
• Honesty, sincerity, respect, integrity and reliability built trust and hold relationships together.
• Erase the word “someday” from your vocabulary.  Don’t save things for special occasions.  Every day is special.  Every day is a gift that we must appreciate and be thankful for.  Wear your attractive clothes, and your nice perfume.  Use your fine silverware and dishes.  Drink from your expensive crystal glasses – just because.  Live every day to the fullest and savor every minute of every day.

These are my favorites.  There are 399 more bits of common sense life and career success advice inside the pages of Advice My Parents Gave Me and Other Lessions I Learned from My Mistakes.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  Successful people seek out inspiration and life and career success advice.  One of the best ways to do this is to read books like Rodolfo Costa’s Advice My Parents Gave Me and Other Lessons I Learned From my Mistakes.  Once you find inspiration or advice take some time to think.  Figure out how that inspiration and advice applies to you.  Then do something.  Take positive action to help you move toward your life and career success.

That’s the career advice I take from Rodofo Costa’s book.  What do you think?  Please take a few minutes to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily musings on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb

Yesterday I did the keynote address at the Childcare Network annual Director’s conference.  I’m not an expert in pre-schools, so I visited a Childcare Network school on Wednesday to get a better understanding of what their School Directors do every day.  I was glad I did!  The Childcare Network schools are amazing places that prepare kids for kindergarten.  I enjoyed my visit so much that I didn’t want to leave.

My blog post yesterday was on the importance of thinking before you speak – especially when you are in a conflict situation.  Among many other things the Childcare Network teaches young children how to manage conflict.  They use a hand as their model.  Posters depicting the hand were prominently displayed in every classroom.

Here is the Childcare Network’s approach to helping children learn how to manage conflict…

1. Thumb.  Cool down. The teacher gets each child to sit down, breathe deep and get calm enough to discuss the problem.
2. Index Finger – Discuss and agree on the problem. The teacher asks for both version of what happened and explains what doesn’t work – like hitting or fighting.  The teacher then guides the kids to figure out what they can do differently.
3. Middle Finger – Brainstorm solutions everybody can live with. The teacher asks the kids to come up with idea on fixing the problem they are having.
4. Ring Finger – Select the solution that seems reasonable to all. The teacher tries to use the kids’ ideas, but offers suggestions if the kids can’t or won’t come up with any ideas.
5. Pinkie – Try it out. The teacher asks the kids to put the ideas into practice, and watch as they do.  The teacher gives positive reinforcement to kids who are able to put the solution to work and gives guidance on how to do so when they are struggling to do so.

Childcare Network teachers report that when they use this conflict management style, the kids get back together after the conflict “as if nothing ever happened.”

In the material they provide parents they say…

“Punishing a child for having a conflict and then telling them to apologize is not the right way to create lasting learning experiences.  Nor is it a good way to create lasting learning experiences that will help children deal with conflict as they get older.”

I teach the same method of conflict resolution to my career success coaching clients…

• Calm down.
• Agree on the problem.
• Brainstorm solutions.
• Pick one.
• Put it into play.

Conflict resolution is a life skill that is important for career success.  Tweet 133 in my career advice book Success Tweets says, “Resolve conflict positively.  Treat conflict as an opportunity to strengthen, not destroy, the relationships you’ve worked hard to build.”

Successful people resolve conflict in a positive manner.  No matter how interpersonally competent, or how easy-going you are, you will inevitably find yourself in conflict.  People will not always agree with you, and you will not always agree with others.

I know a little bit about conflict resolution.  It was the topic of my dissertation at Harvard.  Way back in the 1970’s, Ken Thomas and Ralph Kilmann developed an instrument to measure a person’s tendencies when in a conflict situation.

They came up with five predominant conflict styles:

• Competing
• Collaborating
• Compromising
• Accommodating
• Avoiding.

Their research suggests that all five are appropriate depending on the situation.

As a career success coach however, I have found that the Collaborating style is the best default mode.  When you collaborate with others to resolve conflict, you focus on meeting both your needs and the needs of the other person.  I like this style because it helps you bring together a variety of viewpoints to get the best solution.

The Childcare Network conflict resolution model is based on collaboration.  It gets the kids to focus on the problem behind the conflict and to jointly come up with a solution that works well for both of them.

When you collaborate, neither person is likely to feel as if he or she won or lost.  Also, collaborating with the person or persons with whom you are in conflict creates the opportunity for you to work together to build a solution that best addresses everyone’s concerns.

Successful people are adept at resolving conflict in a positive manner.  Collaboration is the best choice of the five most common handling styles.  When you collaborate with others – especially those with whom you are in conflict – you not only are likely to resolve your conflict in a positive manner, you will strengthen your relationship with the other person.  It’s a win-win.

When I work collaboratively with someone, I focus on our similarities, not our differences.  This creates a bond that not only helps us get through our conflict, but helps us strengthen our relationship, and strong relationships lead to career success.

One of my favorite methods for dealing with conflict in a collaborative manner is counter-intuitive.  By definition, conflict is a state of disagreement.  When I’m in conflict with someone, however, instead of focusing on where we disagree, I focus on where we agree.

This is a great way to not only resolve conflict positively, it helps strengthen relationships.  And, as we all know, conflict often leads to a deterioration of relationships.  To me this approach is a no-brainer.  First, you get to resolve conflict positively.  Second, you strengthen your relationships.  Third, you improve your chances of becoming a life and career success.

I look for any small point of agreement and then try to build on it.  I find that it is easier to reach a larger agreement when I build from a point of small agreement, rather than attempting to tear down the other person’s points with which I don’t agree.

Most people don’t do this.  They get caught up in proving their point.  They hold on to it more strongly when someone else attacks it.  If you turn around the discussion and say, “Let’s focus where we agree, and see if we can build something from there,” you are making the situation less personal.  Now the two of you are working together to figure out a mutually agreeable solution to your disagreement.  You’re not tearing down one another’s arguments just to get your way.  Try this.  It works.

You want to be assertive, not aggressive in resolving conflict.  Here’s a true story.  It happened several years ago on Frontier flight 862, Denver to Phoenix.  I got on late because I was on standby for an earlier flight.  I have a middle seat, 14B.  When I arrive at row 14, there are women sitting in seats A and C.  I say hello, stow my bags, and get into my seat.

The woman in 14A smiles at me, looks at the book I have in my hand, and says, “That looks like an interesting book.”  I’m reading Laura Lowell’s book, 42 rules of Marketing.  We chat a minute about the book and then lapse into some general conversation.

Her name is Cheryl Munsey, and as it turns out, Cheryl and I know a few people in common.  And she’s very personable.  We chat the whole time the plane is taxiing and through take-off.

As soon as the plane is in the air, the woman in 14C rings the flight attendant call button.  The flight attendant comes on the loudspeaker and says, “We are still in our ascent.  Will the person who rang his or her call button turn it off until we reach our cruising altitude?  Leave it on only if it’s a real emergency.”

14C leaves the light on.  I’m worried that she might be ill.  The flight attendant struggles down the aisle.  When she arrives at our row, 14C says, “I need a pair of headphones.  These people are talking too much and driving me crazy.”  As she is saying this, she is removing ear plugs.

I feel bad.  I tend to speak softly in crowded, enclosed places like airplanes and was surprised that our conversation was annoying her – especially when she was wearing ear plugs.  I say to 14C, “I apologize if we were annoying you.  I didn’t realize we were speaking so loudly.”  She says, “I was trying to sleep,” and puts on the headphones that she got from the flight attendant.

Not a minute later, she rings the call button again.  When the flight attendant comes back, she says, “I need another pair.  These earphones aren’t drowning out these people.”  I thought this was kind of peculiar, as Cheryl and I were stunned by what happened and really hadn’t said anything since her original comment that we were speaking too loudly.

All of this should just go into one of those irritating, bizarre moments in life files and be forgotten.  However, it makes a point about personal responsibility, interpersonal competence and life and career success.

The woman in 14C never told Cheryl and me that we were disturbing her sleep.  Instead, she chose to complain to the flight attendant about our conversation.  It came across to both Cheryl and me as a pretty hostile gesture.  We both wondered why she just didn’t ask us to speak more softly.  That’s what an interpersonally competent person would have done.  That’s what someone who was taking responsibility for herself and her needs would have done.

It’s called being assertive.  Assertive people stand up for their rights, but do it in such a way as not to offend other people.  Passive people let others trample on them and don’t stand up for their rights.  Aggressive people get what they want, but at the expense of others.  In this case, 14C was being aggressive.  As I think back on that rather bizarre episode, I wish that Ms. 14 C had the benefit of attending a Childcare Network school when she was a child.

There are two career success coach points here.  Both are simple common sense.  First, take responsibility for yourself.  Tell people how you feel.  Don’t let others do things that make your life unpleasant.  Second, stand up for yourself and resolve conflict in an assertive, non-aggressive, collaborative manner.  Follow the career advice in Tweet 133 in Success Tweets.  “Resolve conflict positively.  Treat conflict as an opportunity to strengthen, not destroy, the relationships you’ve worked hard to build.”  Conflict can destroy relationships – and it can strengthen them.  When you find yourself in conflict with another person, choose to see it as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with them.  Collaborate with them to solve your joint problem.  In this way, you’ll resolve conflict positively and strengthen the relationships that are key to your life and career success.

That’s my career advice on conflict resolution – and that of the Childcare Network as well.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily musings on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb

Carol Hansen is one of my Facebook friends.  She posted a great little acronym the other day “T H I N K Before You Speak.”

T Is it True?
H Is it Helpful?
I Is it Inspiring?
N Is it Necessary?
K Is it Kind?

This is great career advice and it will help you build and maintain the solid, long lasting relationships you need to create your life and career success.  When it comes to building strong, lasting relationships I give my career success coach clients three bits of common sense advice…

1. Get to know yourself.  Use this self-knowledge to better understand others and adapt your communication style to them.
2. Pay it forward.  Do for others without waiting for them to do for you.
3. Resolve conflict in a manner that will strengthen – not weaken – your relationships.

The third point is where Carol’s acronym comes in handy.  In conflict situations we often say things that we wish we could take back later.  Unfortunately, once something is said, it’s said.  Carol’s advice – think before you speak – can help you from saying something that can harm your relationships.

When you speak the objective truth about the situation – something on which you and the other person can agree – you’re unlikely to run into a problem.

When you are helpful – suggesting ways to resolve the conflict in a mutually agreeable manner – you will be strengthening your relationship.

When you are inspiring – looking for something that can uplift you both – you can use the disagreement to help you both move forward to your goals.

When you say only what is necessary – not all the extraneous stuff you might be feeling, or want to say to get in a dig – you are bringing the issue into a clear focus instead of muddying the waters.

When you are kind – not hurtful – in your words, you are showing a genuine concern for the other person.  You are treating him or her with the dignity and respect he or she deserves as a fellow human being.  No matter how contentious the situation, this is always a great way to strengthen your relationship with him or her.

A couple of years ago, I had an opportunity to preview a great DVD on relationship building called, Little Things Mean a Lot.  The DVD is based on the work of Brigid Moynahan, founder of The Next level Inc.  She is a well-known and highly recognized speaker and trainer.

Ms. Moynahan says that when it comes to relationships, it’s important to sweat the small stuff.  She says that we send micro-messages in all of our interactions with other people.  Micro-messages are the signals we send to one another through our behavior.  While micro-messages are often small, their impact can be enormous.

Micro-messages can help or hinder your relationship-building efforts.  Micro-affirmations help you build and maintain strong relationships.  Micro-inequities hinder your ability to build and maintain strong relationships.  When you T H I N K before you speak – especially in conflict situations– you are my likely to send micro-affirmations and avoid micro-inequities.

To be clear, micro-affirmations are messages that we send to other people that cause them to feel valued, included, or encouraged.  Micro-inequities are messages that we send to other people that cause them to feel devalued, slighted, discouraged or excluded.

Ms. Moynahan puts a diversity spin on her work.  While I agree that moving from an organizational culture based on micro-inequities to one based on micro-affirmations will build a more inclusive – and thereby productive and profitable – organization, I also believe there are life and career success lessons to be learned here.

Ask yourself, “When do I feel excluded, disrespected and devalued?”  In most of these cases, you have been the recipient of a micro-inequity.  The way you feel when you experience a micro-inequity is the way others are likely to feel when you engage in micro-inequity behavior.  That means you should refrain from using these behaviors in your interactions with others.

Then do just the opposite.  Ask yourself, “When do I feel included, respected and valued?”  In most of these cases, you will have been the recipient of a micro-affirmation.  Work hard to incorporate behaviors that are micro-affirmations into your daily interactions with others.

In short, when you focus on sending micro-affirmations and avoiding micro-inequities — when you T H I N K before you speak — you will be better able to resolve conflict positively and build solid, lasting relationships with the people in your life.  And strong relationships are an important key to your personal and professional success.

The common sense career success point here is simple.  Successful people follow the career advice in Tweet 123 in Success Tweets.  “Use every social interaction to build and strengthen relationships.  Strong relationships are your ticket to success.”  Build and strengthen relationships by sweating the small stuff.  T H I N K before you speak.  Focus sending positive micro messages – the small things that show another person that you value him or her.  Avoid “micro-inequities” – behaviors that demean people in small ways.  Instead, focus on “micro-affirmations” – behaviors that encourage others and build their self-esteem.

That’s my career advice based on Carol Hansen’s acronym “T H I N K before you speak.”  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily musings on life and career success.  I really appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.

Every month I do an interview with a senior executive for members of My Corporate Climb.  If you’re not a member and would like to be, please go to http://MyCorporateClimb.com and sign up.

My interview for February is with Van Horsley, Chief Operating Officer for the Colorado Division of First Citizen’s Bank.  In the interview, which will be posted on My Corporate Climb the second Tuesday of February, Van shared his seven points for career success…

1. Always act with integrity.
2. Show up early.
3. Work harder than your peers.
4. Learn your company’s business.
5. Get engaged in your company’s business.
6. Understand how what you do contributes to your company’s business success.
7. Make yourself indispensable to your boss.

That’s some great common sense advice for creating your career success.

I really like number 7 – make yourself indispensable to your boss – for two reasons.  First, your boss has a lot to say about things that impact your life and career success.  He or she does your performance reviews, has input to your raises and is often in a position to promote you.  Second, when you are indispensable to your boss, he or she is likely to recommend you to take his or her job when he or she gets promoted.

There are many ways you can make yourself indispensable to your boss.  Technology is a good place to start.  For example, you can become a PowerPoint expert.  You can turn the idea your boss generates into high quality presentations that will help him or her shine.

Or, if you have an analytical mind, you can help your boss tackle complex problems that affect your company’s business, and come up with well thought out plans to address them.

I know of one woman who became a wardrobe advisor to her boss.  As it turns out, her was single and color blind – not a good combination for looking sharp at work every day.  She helped him purchase clothes that looked good when worn together.  This helped him get a promotion – and your guessed it, he promoted her.

I’d like to hear your thoughts and suggestions for making yourself indispensable to your boss.  What do you do?  What have you seen others do?  Please pass along your ideas in a comment on this post.  I’ll send everybody who comments the eBook version of the latest book in the Success Tweets series, Success Tweets for Creating Positive Personal Impact.  Please take a minute now to leave your comment.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  Van Horsley of First Citizens Bank says that there are seven things he’s done over the course of his career to create his success.  1) Always act with integrity.  2) Show up early.  3) Work harder than your peers.  4) Learn your company’s business.  5) Get engaged in your company’s business.  6) Understand how what you do contributes to your company’s business success.  7) Make yourself indispensable to your boss.  If you apply these common sense ideas in your career you’ll be on your way to the life and career success you want and deserve.

That’s my career advice based on Van Horsley’s seven keys to success.  What do you think?  Get a free copy of Success Tweets for Creating Positive Personal Impact by leaving a comment sharing your best ideas for making yourself indispensable to your boss.  As always thanks for reading my daily thoughts on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.

I was doing an interview with Cathy Gettings the other day.  It was part of her upcoming Magnetic Mindshift telesummit.  I’ll let you know when she has it ready to go.  If my interview with Cathy is any indication, it should be dynamite and a great career success event.

As we were discussing the importance of dressing for success Cathy said, “Your appearance should show that you have some respect for yourself.”

I had to chuckle, because I always tell my success coach clients, “Look in the mirror on your way out the door in the morning.  Ask yourself, ‘does my appearance demonstrate that I respect myself and the people I’ll meet today’.”

It’s true.  Your appearance says a lot about you – how much you respect yourself, and how much you respect others.  My best advice on to how your attire can help you create positive personal impact is simple and common sense.  Dress one level up.  In other words, dress a little nicer than you have to.  For example, if your office is casual, wear a dress or a suit every once in a while.

Make sure your clothes and shoes are clean and in good repair.  Keep your hair clean and well styled.  Make sure your shoes are shined.  Look in the mirror on your way out the door.  Ask yourself, “Will I impress other people with the way I look today?”  If the answer is “no”, take a few minutes and change before you go to work.

I always get dressed up when I am meeting clients.  Many of my clients dress casually.  When they tell me, “You didn’t need to wear a suit today,” I say, “Yes I did.  I’m meeting with an important person — you.”  Show respect for yourself and the people around you by dressing well and looking good.

Accessories are another part of your appearance.  In general, you want your accessories to compliment, not over power your clothing.  Keep them understated and elegant.  Large rings and earring, bracelets that jangle every time you move can distract from your look and your professionalism.  Save the bling for evenings out, tone it down at work

Pay attention to your electronic accessories.  About a year ago, I saw a Wall Street Journal article about electronic accessories.  It made some interesting points about cell phones, PDAs and other electronic helpers – all small enough to tote around with us all the time – and how they can hurt your image as a professional.  Look around, you’ll see that most senior executives aren’t overburdened by electronic accessories.

In Wildly Sophisticated, my friend Nicole Williams lays out ten fashion commandments.  I think they are invaluable advice for creating a professional look

1. Sweat the small stuff. People don’t necessarily notice if you’re groomed, but they definitely notice when you’re not.
2. Restrain yourself. Never let your accessories wear you.
3. Know your body. Recognize that every style trend is not designed for you. This isn’t a limitation – its just reality.
4. Black is your friend. Black staples – pants, skirts and jackets are clean, classic and they always look good. They’re flattering, will work with everything else in your closet and will stretch your clothing budget.
5. Focus on your feet. A great pair of shoes can make all the difference in your look.  Make sure your footwear is polished and clean. This is another one of those details that people really do notice.
6. Welcome the three-way mirror.  Clothes that fit well make you look better and help your confidence.
7. Work it. Style is really a synonym for self-expression. You’ll feel and look better when your clothes reflect your personality.
8. Buy quality. In the long run, quality clothes will actually save you money.
9. Invest in accessories.  Your bag or briefcase is a constant companion. Clients, employers and colleagues will all notice what’s draped on your arm. Invest in a quality piece that reflects your style. And in this age of laptops, cell phones and PDAs, a bag that will carry your hardware is a lifesaver.
10. Relax. Bottom line? Its just fashion. Give it your best shot; know that style matters and that looking groomed and professional are important for your career.

The career success coach point here is simple common sense.  Your appearance says a lot about you.  Dress in a manner that shows you respect yourself – and the people you will meet during your day.  Take the time to show that you care – and people will respond positively to you.  Dress one level up from what is expected and you will stand out from the crowd.

That’s my career advice on the importance of your appearance.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily thoughts on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.

Joe Paterno passed away over the weekend.  You probably know this but he was the football coach at Penn State for the past 46 years.  He has more wins than any other coach in Division I college football.  He was known for running a very clean program with no recruiting violations or scandals.  Besides building a winning football program, Joe did a lot for Penn State, giving millions of dollars to the university to expand the library.

I’m a Penn State alum.  Joe was the head coach when I arrived there in the Fall of 1968.  I was always proud to be a Penn State alum.  I was especially proud of the football program and is reputation for fair play.

That all changed for me last Fall when one of Joe’s longtime assistant coaches was charged with several counts of child sex abuse.  You probably know the story.  In 2002, one of Joe’s assistant coaches, Mike McQueary observed Sandusky, who was retired but still had access to the Penn State football facilities, raping a young boy in a shower.  McQueary told Joe, who reported the incident to the Athletic Director.

Sandusky was never barred from the Penn State training facilities, and it is alleged that he continued to abuse young boys up until his arrest last Fall.  Many people, myself included, feel that Joe Paterno should have done more to follow up on what McQueary told him.  Make no mistake, he did what was required of him by law – he even testified at the Grand Jury investigating the allegations.  But doing what’s legal, isn’t necessarily doing what’s right.

Joe Paterno will forever be regarded as a great football coach, but one who gave tacit approval to child sex abuse.  And that’s the career success point of this post.   Your personal brand and reputation are important.  Guard them with all your might.

Last Friday, I was doing an interview for my membership site with Van Horsley, President of the Colorado operations of a large national bank.  I do these interviews to give my members inside advice on life and career success from successful people.  If you would like to see what the membership site is all about, go to http://www.MyCorporateClimb.com.  In our interview, Van concluded his remarks by saying, “Your integrity is an asset.  And once you spend that asset, it’s gone forever.”

As I listened to the coverage of Joe Paterno’s passing, I was reminded of Van’s remarks on integrity.  Joe Paterno spent his integrity when he didn’t follow up on the allegations about Jerry Sandusky.  By not doing so, and by continuing to let this man have access to the Penn State athletic facilities, Joe lost his integrity – which is too bad, because by all accounts he is a man of high integrity.

But that’s the way it goes.  It takes a long time to build a reputation as a person of integrity.  One foolish move can destroy all that.  All of the coverage on Joe’s passing said he “was a great football coach, BUT…”

Tweet 62 in my career advice book Success Tweets says, “Your personal brand should be unique to you, but built on integrity.  Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking.”

According to Wikipedia, “Integrity is consistency of actions, values, methods, measures and principles.”  Integrity and consistency are intertwined.  People who are consistent in their actions are seen as people with a high degree of integrity.

Oprah says, “Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.”  This is true.  If you practice situational ethics – doing the right thing only when you’re in the public eye — you aren’t really a person of high integrity, you’re just pretending to be one.

Besides, it’s hard to act one way in public, and another in private.  So to be safe, resolve to act like Oprah.  Do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do – not because you’ll get credit, or avoid getting into trouble.

John Maxwell is a well-known business author.  One of his books sends the same message.  It’s called, There’s No Such Thing As Business Ethics: There’s Only One Rule for Making Decisions.  According to John, that rule is the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  In other words, do the right thing.

There’s a practical side to this too.  Mark Twain once said, “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”  In other words, if you’re always a person of high integrity, it’s easy to be a person of high integrity; there are no complicating factors – like remembering what you did or said in a given situation.

Polonius gave similar advice to Hamlet.  “To thine own self be true, and it must follow as the day the night, thou canst be false to no man.”  Roy Blackman, my father in law, passed away a few years ago.  This quote was his epitaph.  It was on the program handed out at his funeral.  Roy embodied it in how he lived his life.  It was the only piece of advice he gave his grandson, Matt, as he went off to college.

Oprah, John Maxwell, Mark Twain and Shakespeare are all in agreement on one common sense piece of career advice.  If you want to become known as a person of high integrity – and I believe integrity is the cornerstone of any personal brand – act as a person of high integrity all the time – not just when it suits you, or when someone might notice.

Here’s a story to illustrate this point.  Cathy, my wife, was a flight attendant for 36 years.  Seniority is a very important thing in the airline industry.  It governs how you bid for trips, positions on the airplane and vacations – almost anything important to a flight attendant’s quality of work life.

Cathy was very active in her union.  And seniority was one of the union’s most sacred principles.  A few years before she retired, Cathy’s airline made a big push into the international market.  International flights were plum assignments; they went to people with high seniority.

However, the airline realized that it would be to their advantage to have some flight attendants who spoke the language of the country to which they were flying on these international flights.  Most flight attendants in her airline spoke English only.  The airline proposed putting two “language speakers” on each international flight.  Many people, including Cathy, were upset with this arrangement as they felt it violated the seniority concept.

Cathy used to fly from the US to London.  One day I said to her, “This whole language speaker issue doesn’t really affect you.  You fly to London; there are no language speakers on those flights.  Why do you care so much?”  She said, “I believe in the concept of seniority.  It doesn’t matter if I’m affected by language speakers.  It’s the principle of the thing.”  That’s consistency – and integrity — in action.

And that brings us back to Joe Paterno.  Here was a man with an incredibly strong personal brand.  He was known for doing the right thing in a business where too many people don’t do the right thing.  Sadly, his legacy is forever tarnished, because of what he didn’t do at a moment of truth.  I’m not writing this post to pass judgment on Joe – enough people have done that already.  I am writing it however, to reinforce my point of building your personal brand on integrity.

The common sense career success coach point here is simple.  Creating positive personal impact is one of the competencies all successful people possess.  You create positive personal impact by developing and nurturing your unique personal brand, being impeccable in your presentation of self, and knowing and following the basic rules of etiquette.  Your personal brand should be uniquely you, but it should be built on integrity.  Follow the advice in Tweet 62 in Success Tweets.  “Your personal brand should be uniquely you, but built on integrity.  Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking.”  As the sad ending to Joe Paterno’s career and life demonstrates, even a momentary lapse in your integrity can lead to serious consequences for a carefully crafted brand.

That’s the career advice I take from the sad ending of Joe Paterno’s life and career.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to share your thoughts with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading my daily thoughts on life and career success.  I value you and I appreciate you.

Bud

PS: If you haven’t already done so, please download a free copy of my popular career advice book Success Tweets and its companion piece Success Tweets Explained.  The first gives you 140 bits of career success advice tweet style — in 140 characters or less.  The second is a whopping 390 + pages of career advice explaining each of the common sense tweets in Success Tweets in detail.  Go to http://budurl.com/STExp to claim your free copy.  You’ll also start receiving my daily life and career success quotes.

PPS: I opened a membership site last September.  It’s called My Corporate Climb and is devoted to helping people create career success inside large corporations.  You can find out about the membership site by going to http://www.mycorporateclimb.